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Office of the Boston University Om buds Francine Montenegro, Boston University Om buds I Message or I Statements When you are in conflict, you may have difficulty clearly articulating your situation
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How to fill out i messages or i

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01
Start by identifying your emotions: Before writing an i message, it's important to be clear about your own emotions. Take a moment to reflect on how you feel and what specifically triggered those feelings.
02
Use "I" statements: The i message technique involves using "I" statements to express your feelings and needs instead of blaming or criticizing others. This helps to foster open communication and avoids putting the other person on the defensive.
03
Describe the situation or behavior: Clearly and specifically describe the situation or behavior that has affected you. Be objective and stick to the facts rather than making assumptions or generalizations.
04
Express your feelings: After describing the situation, share your emotions using "I feel" statements. Be honest and authentic about how you feel, but avoid being overly aggressive or confrontational.
05
State the impact: Explain how the situation or behavior has impacted you personally. This helps the other person understand the consequences of their actions and promotes empathy.
06
State your needs or expectations: Clearly communicate what you need or expect from the other person in order to resolve the situation. This could involve specific actions, changes in behavior, or simply a request for open dialogue.

Who needs i messages or i?

01
Anyone seeking to improve their communication skills: i messages or i can be valuable for anyone looking to enhance their communication skills. It provides a structured approach to expressing emotions and needs without resorting to blame or criticism.
02
Couples or individuals in conflict: i messages or i are particularly useful in resolving conflicts between couples or individuals. It promotes understanding, empathy, and collaboration, setting the stage for productive discussions and resolution of issues.
03
Professionals in the workplace: i messages or i can be beneficial in a professional setting, helping to address conflicts or differences of opinion in a constructive manner. It encourages respectful communication and problem-solving, fostering a positive work environment.
In summary, filling out i messages or i involves identifying your emotions, using "I" statements, describing the situation, expressing your feelings, stating the impact, and stating your needs or expectations. This communication technique can be useful for individuals seeking to improve their communication skills, couples or individuals in conflict, and professionals in the workplace.
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