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...AND IT WAS JUST AS EASY AS 1, 2, 3. TINY CLASSIFIED ADS. THAT'S RIGHT. THIS IS SO INSPIRATIONAL. Your DAMN RIGHT IT'S INSPIRATIONAL. I WENT FROM A GUY WHO WAS CONSTANTLY BEHIND ON HIS MONTHLY RENT TO A MULTIMILLIONAIRE ENTREPRENEUR... AND IT'S SO SIMPLE, TOO. THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT GENIUS. I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY MORE PEOPLE DON'T DO IT. OPERATORS... WELL, THEY'RE STANDING BY. 'CAUSE THEY'RE SCARED, LARRY. AFRAID TO TAKE RISK, MAN. YEAH. TOLD YOU THE MAN'S A GENIUS. AND HE'S MAKING MOVES. SEE THE SIZE OF THAT YACHT? YEAH. THAT WAS A NICE YACHT. THAT'S WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT, MAN. AND YOU HEARD THE MAN, RIGHT? “ANYBODY CAN DO IT.” EXACTLY. KNOW WHAT'S SAD? HUH? A MAN WHO'S SO AFRAID TO TAKE A RISK THAT HE WASTES HIS WHOLE LIFE PLAYING IT SAFE. LOOK AT MY UNCLE VICTOR. YOU REMEMBER HIM, RIGHT? MMM-HMM. THIS CAT WORKED 3 FULL-TIME JOBS FOR 35 YEARS, MAN. 3 FULL-TIME JOBS FOR WHAT? HE AIN'T GOT SHIT. A DAMN RAGGEDY-ASS HOUSE THAT HE'S STILL PAYING FOR. AND THEN ON TOP OF THAT, GUESS WHAT? THEY FORCED HIS ASS INTO EARLY RETIREMENT. YOU KNOW WHAT THEY GAVE HIM? 401(K)? NO. A PAT ON THE BACK AND A FUCKING WATCH, MAN. NOW, WAS THAT WORTH IT? WELL, IT DEPENDS ON THE WATCH. I MEAN, IF THEY GAVE HIM A PATEL PHILIPPE OR A ROGER DuBois... THAT'S NOT THE POINT, MAN. THE POINT IS, THE GUY IS DYING OF ASS CANCER NOW. ALL MESSED UP. HIS KIDS ALL MESSED UP ON DRUGS. ONE OF THEM IS A FUCKING TRANNY. WHICH ONE? YOU CRAZY? LISA. [coughing] LISA'S A DUDE? YEAH, YOU KNEW LISA WAS A DUDE, RIGHT? [coughing] YEAH, OF COURSE I KNEW. THIS IS SOME GOOD SHIT, RIGHT? [knocking on door] WHO IS IT? LANCE. (Dick on T.V.) ... I WENT FROM A GUY WHO WAS CONSTANTLY BEHIND ON HIS RENT... YOUR LANDLORD! [man yelling] [Lance chuckling] LANCE! HEY! HI, LANCE. WE WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT YOU. REALLY? WHAT, WERE YOU, UH... (Lance) WHAT? IT'S YOUR FLIP-FLOPS, LANCE. MY FLIP-FLOPS? YOU Have to TAKE THEM OFF, MAN. IT'S KIND OF ZEN THING WE DO AROUND THE APARTMENT HERE. OH. [people yelling in Spanish] OH. UH, LISTEN, UM, GUYS. REALLY, I, UH, I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY NEED THE RENT MONEY. BUT IT'S NOT DUE TILL THE 5TH. BUT IT'S THE 15TH. AND, YOU'RE ALREADY 3 MONTHS BEHIND. SO, AM I Going to SEE SOME MONEY? [inhaling] NOT EXACTLY. [stuttering] YOU KNOW, TECHNICALLY, JUST TECHNICALLY, YOU'RE NOT ON THIS LEASE. BUT WHEN STEVE MOVED OUT-- WHEN STEVE MOVED OUT, I LET YOU GUYS COME IN, AND YOU'RE GOOD GUYS. YOU'RE GOOD GUYS, BUT YOU'RE ALWAYS LATE WITH THE RENT MONEY. WAIT A MINUTE, LANCE. [stuttering] THERE'VE BEEN A FEW TIMES-- Regardless. REGARDLESS. UH, WHAT? REGARDLESS. I MEAN, “Regardless” ISN'T A WORD. (Rico) L-LISTEN, LANCE. THINGS ARE REALLY ABOUT TO POP OVER HERE. WE'RE IN THE PROCESS OF GETTING A BUSINESS OFF THE GROUND. YEAH, IT'S A “TINY CLASSIFIED ADS” BUSINESS. A “TINY CLASSIFIED ADS” BUSINESS? YEAH. FOR WHAT? WELL, THAT'S NOT THE POINT. YOU SEE, LANCE, THE ADS THEMSELVES GENERATE...
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